Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Sin's Scale


If your sin is small then your Savior will be small also. 
But if your sin is great, then your Savior must be great. 
– Charles Spurgeon

When I was growing up in church I heard this quote once and it hooked onto me, but not in the right way. You see, growing up in an amazing Christian family kept me walking in the right with only “small” sins that persisted in me. Then, after giving my life to Jesus at a young age, I tried to separate myself from things that entangled, at least the things that were big. My old friends eventually began to party and do all sorts of stuff while I kept back and followed Jesus. I had struggled at times wondering why I wasn’t as in love with Jesus as I thought I should be and then I found this quote that justified my feelings. I didn’t love Jesus as much as some because my sin was small. I would meet people who gave their lives to Jesus who were set free from lives of drugs, alcoholism, adultery, etc and their love for Jesus was greater and more passionate than mine and it’s because they were freed from more sin.

I used to get angry with God almost wishing that I had sinned more so that I could have loved Him more. How could God expect me to love Him as much as these other people? I was the good kid growing up! He didn’t have to work as hard for me. What little I knew. My whole mindset and understanding of this quote was completely wrong.

Years later I have grown in deeper and stronger intimacy with the Lord. Throughout college, with the help of an amazing community at Antioch, my love for Jesus has grown and grown. My hatred towards sin has increased. The amount of times I am disobedient grows smaller and smaller. The “size” of my sins are smaller. Yet, with all of this becoming further from sin I am loving Jesus more. That doesn’t follow the formula of the quote I hated for so long! So what happened? 

I learned that the size of my sin is not measured by the standards of the world but rather the size of my sin is measured by God’s holiness. The more I understand how holy God is, the more I understand how big my sin is. By the world’s standards my sin actually decreased, but the more I perceived God’s holiness the worse my sins looked. Before bad actions were a big sin and bad thoughts were just little sins (if I considered them sin at all). Now, even one errant thought can bring me to my knees in repentance. The little things have now become the frontlines of the battle.

This is why Paul calls himself the “worst of sinners” (1 Timothy 1:15b). From the world’s perspective Paul would have been called the greatest of saints! He gave up his life and started churches all over the world. Yet he calls himself the worst of sinners. Why? Because he understood God’s holiness. The more and more he went after Jesus and His Gospel, he grew closer to Jesus, and the closer he got the more he could see His holiness.

We always hear in church about the fear of the Lord, but to be honest most people (at least I didn’t for a long time) probably don’t really know what that means. They may think of it as fearing hell so they call for grace while clinging to their sin. The fear of the Lord understands how holy God is and how much He hates sin. Too many in the church today have a small savior. We do not believe that the little things are sins. A joking yet rude comment, if it makes enough people laugh, isn’t a sin. Following the girl who walks by with my eyes and lustful heart isn’t a sin. Keeping every dime I own for myself is not greedy but frugal. We justify our sin and believe we are holy. 

We have numbed ourselves and have taken the world’s guidelines for morality and have used it for our own guidelines for sin. This is not meant to be an attack, but rather a challenge for each and every one of us. A challenge to look at God and discover just how holy He is. A challenge to take a step ahead of the world and show how the church isn’t just a place to make people act moral, it’s a place where people look like Jesus which far exceeds simple morality.

So let’s take a step back and look at everything we do with the lense of Jesus. Let us pursue His presence and get a greater understanding of His holiness. When we worship, study the word, spend time in community, we begin to get a greater understanding of God’s character and thus His holiness. Let us have a big Savior. Let’s ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to us our sin and help us overcome it!


As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; for it is written: "Be holy, because I am holy." – 1 Peter 1:14-16

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Why I'm making a blog

For a while now I’ve felt like God wanted me to make a blog although I don’t know why. I’m not really a writer and it’s just not something that seems like me. I’ve pushed it off but earlier today I’ve started to realize my disobedience. It was already disobedience that I have waited this long to make the blog, but I want to answer God’s calling. So that’s why I made this blog. I want it to be a way for me to share what God is teaching me in my everyday life and hopefully help others learn and grow faster than I did. I want Jesus to be glorified, not me. I in no way claim to be perfect or have perfect thoughts, so take everything said to God and His Word.

So why not start with what I’m realizing today and just being open and vulnerable? I realized that my fear of the Lord is tiny. I may not be doing drugs or murdering people or any other blatant sin, but every single time I disobey even the littlest of His commands I sin. “The fear of God is evidenced in our lives by instant, joyful and whole obedience to God. That is biblical obedience. Anything else is disobedience.” God told me to make a blog probably a week or more ago. I just did today. As I walked around today God told me to talk to random people and I didn’t. At one point I was scared to ask God what He wanted me to do because I didn’t believe that I would do it if it didn’t fit my comfort zone or agenda. I plan my day out on my own accord instead of asking Him. What I’m doing is just trying to make God happy by being responsible and obedient with the big, blatant things, but allowing the little things to still be under my control. I must listen for and obey even the smallest things “pray continually” (1 Thessalonians 5:17).

So what’s my point? My point is that I am called to submit my life to Jesus full heartedly! I want to fear God as I would a Father who wants the best for His son. I want to hate sin as much as God does. I WANT to be disciplined when I disobey God (yes, I am kind of scared to ask God this, but I will because it’s worth it). I want to be faithful in His eyes. I don’t want to care what the people around me think; I just want to care what God thinks. And this starts through a couple of ways.

1) Recognizing the areas of disobedience I currently live in no matter how “small” and repenting of them.
2) Asking God to give me His hatred of sin and asking for his discipline when I disobey.
3) Obeying Him in quick, joyful, and full obedience.
4) Constantly asking God what I should do. This is even when I’m walking from one place to another, when I’m driving what music to listen to (or not), etc.
5) A continual clinging to the cross and filling of the Holy Spirit.


So I get the fear of the Lord, then what? Then I experience freedom. His plan is always right and good. Being obedient is the smartest, funnest, free-est thing that I could possible do. More joy. More love. More life. Lord, help me understand what it means to fear You, and Holy Spirit do it in me